- Susan Fletcher, Ph.D.
How to Manage Mom Guilt
Recently Fox 4 Good Day invited me to discuss Mom guilt. Click here to watch the segment. Here are a few of the tips we discussed: Take time for youself: If your needs aren't met you won't be able to meet the needs of those that need you most. Set your alarm to wake up 30 minutes before everyone else in house so you can enjoy your morning shower and cup of coffee in peace. Whether it is grabbing a café mocha at your favorite coffee place, going to dinner with a friend, getting a pedicure or reading a favorite book, schedule in time each day, week and month for you. Secure and maintain quality child care. Knowing that your children are in the best hands while you're at work will give you the confidence you need to be productive while you're away. Take time to get to know who is caring for your kids and develop a relationship with your child care provider. Delegate, delegate, delegate. Assign tasks to others when you can. Perhaps you can't afford to hire a full-time housekeeper, but you can afford to have someone come in once a week to do the ironing. Consider what tasks you can delegate to others so you can have more time in your day for your family. Establish your "Momtourage." Become familiar with the people, places and things in your community that can make your life easier. Do your grocery shopping online after the kids go to bed and have it delivered. Choose a drycleaner that picks up and drops off. The less time you have to spend on tasks, the more time you have to spend with your family. Manage your expectations. You can't be all things to all people. Once you're able to grasp your limitations, you're better able to manage your expectations. Perhaps you can't be the weekly classroom volunteer, but you may be able to be the snack mom or assist the teacher in other ways. The truth is all moms, working or not, will at some time or another experience mommy guilt. The key is to manage it so that you can evaluate your choices based on what's best for your family.